Thought Purging

I keep this thing called a journal. I don't write every day, but I write a lot, often.

Sometimes it's menial things like what happened that day, or sometimes it'll be my thoughts on something I read that day, a scripture or quote or text.

More often, however, I go through these things called thought purges.
Instead of real vomit I go through word vomit.

Everything I've consumed in the past week (feelings, thoughts, discussions, events) gets spit out onto several pages. Some of my most meaningful/interesting journal entries are thought binges.
Why? Because they are just full of reflections and questions and uncensored thought.
As we get older, our thought processes change, especially mine. Looking back on these entries lets me see how I used to think versus how I think now.

I'm not the person I was yesterday, and I won't be the same person tomorrow.

sigh... Perhaps I change too much.

But what is life if not a continual process of self-betterment?

I love thought purges.
Today I purged relationships.

They scare me.

so bad.

This sounds like a contradictory statement since I've been in a relationship ever since I was 14 and have absolutely no clue how to "really be single" but everyone has their irrational fears I suppose.

I mean how well can you ever truly know a person? And what is it that I'm even afraid of? failure? commitment? physical closeness? trust?
Probably a bit of all of the above. hm. I guess I'll figure it out.
Time is the solution to every problem.
I've just got to give it some time.